Here is another old post during my modeling days. Oh how I miss the modeling days. maybe one day I could get back into modeling. I would really love that, I need to drink more water and start taking better care of my hair and then I could model again. I was just in a video that will be posted on the internet very soon. I will let you know when that goes up. For now here is that old post I was talking about:
I don't tan I burn and by burn I do not mean pink I mean RED. So when I was told I would get more modeling jobs if I had a tan I was definitely not going to go out and lay in the sun. Plus I don not really want skin cancer at any time in my life and so I see the burning thing as sort of a blessing in disguise. I have though picked up so jergins lotion that is supposed to give you more color gradually if you use it every day for a week. This is true but the color I am getting is more orange than tan. I am going to use it for a week and see what happens so far I have used it for 3 days and the orange is either going away or I am getting more used to it. Honestly I can't say which it is.
I don't like it though, I really like myself the way I am. I know that may seem weird to a lot of people but I have worked hard to get to that point of just being happy with myself. Now I am being told that I need to use this shampoo and this makeup and I need to workout and get a tan and...and...and...you get the point. Even if you like yourself this litany of things that just aren't quite right with me is making me self-conscience and it is making me wonder if I am all that great. It makes for a great daily internal struggle.
In this situation If I fight the system, I fight myself.
Listening to: took the words right out of my mouth - Meatloaf
Another old post
reviewing old journal entries
I am reviewing old journal entries today and in that found the very first entry I posted on my livejournal. Which I don't write on so much any more. I suprise myself that I even think of myself that way but I guess I did. Here it is:
This is only the begining. I am currently on Open Diary but I think now that I am learning more about how live journal works I like it better than OD not as flashy but I have a lot more control and we all know how I love the control. Actually I seem to love giving the guise that I don't like having control yet all the while if I loose control I have a huge hissy fit. As I learn about myself I find out these little things that I do. I am supprised I even care about control but after careful consideration I have decided that yes this is somethine else I have to work on and become better about. Note to Self: do not be anal about having control over all situations. You Do Not Always Need To Be In Charge.
And on that note I will leave you for right now.
Listening to: The Black Keys (white boys with soul)
Ten lucky people win free stuff!!!
Why?
Why does it feel like my life has been religated to watching the baby? I feel like a nanny who never gets to go home and doesn't get paid. It seems as though my husband gets to walk off whenever he wants usually without even mentioning that he is going while I am just expected to continue keeping an eye on the little guy. What if I ant to check my email or something? Any time my husband tries to do something with the LG to give me two minutes they end up watching TV which is what they are doing right now. So now I feel bad for writing this because all they are doing is watching SpongeBob. I work so hard to keep him out from in front of the television all day just to have my husband sit him down with a cartoon whenever he gets the opportunity.
Horrible job
I'm really doing a horrible job posting everyday. Actually I would go so far as to say I've failed. I was doing good for a while then I went away from home to visit my family in Florida and it sort of went out the window.
Oh well, I am going to do my best not to worry about it and just try again in May.
I haven't had Internet access since the 11th so I guess I get points for doing everything I have done with my iPhone.
I just realized that I missed the What's On My Nightstand segment this month, that sucks! Maybe I'll do it anyway when we get home tomorrow. Or maybe I'll save it all for next week, oh I don't know.
Damn it's hot
So we have been in Florida for a few days now and I have to say it feels hotter here than I remember it being.
I have been living in New Orleans for over three years now, I remember when we first moved there the temperature was actually higher but the heat was different. The humidity is opressive in New Orleans but here in Fort Myers over the last few days it feels more like New Orleans than I ever remember it. Maybe I haave just been away too long.
On another aubject, I have noticed that when I use my iPhone to post (like I am doing now) the quality of my writing drops significantly. I feel rushed like because I am typing on a cell phone I should be hurrying for some reason. Once I get used to using my iPhone for these kinds of things hopefully my writing quality won't suffer so.
Amazon rank issue
Why don't people seem to understand that by forcing something on others whether the thing is seen as socially aceptable or not is still oppressive and infriges upon the freedoms issued to all people under the American Constitution?
Evidently Amazon decided to remove all rankings from books with adult content over the weekend. They now say it was a mistake but at first they didn't. I found out about it on twitter then scanned the AP for verification and found this blog post too. I can't figure out why people think this way and how those people become in charge of major corporations. I really don't buy the glitch thing, why would it focus on adult and gay and lesbian books?
Anyway, since I can't seem to do links on blogpress here is the blog; www.smartbitchestrashybooks.com
Love the Florida Welcome Center
There are a few things to love about the Florida Welcome Center, at least the one entering on Interstate 10. The welcome center offers a lot more than a simple rest area. The first extra is virtually impossible to miss, it's a Air Force plane on a stick in the middle of the parking lot. You can see from the picture that the little one greatly enjoyed pointing out the plane. When the plane loses some of it's luster take yourself inside the welcome center itself for some brochure shopping. This place is full of brochure to seemingly any and every attraction in the entire state of Florida. I guess that is the point of a welcome center but it still seems like a little overkill. It won't be too hard to make it past the brochures because they give away free little cups of orange juice. My little guy loved the little cups so much he didn't want to throw them away so they ended up bringing him extra fun on the road even after we left the welcome center.
In my quest
In my quest to write a post everyday in the month of April I am left with some times when I don't have much to say. Today I spent most of the day getting ready to leave. We are driving to Florida tomorrow to spend Easter with my family. We will actually be staying for the next two weeks. My hubby will be leaving for work next Wednesday, the Little Guy and myself will be staying till at least the 23rd. I am very happy to be going to get out of the city, especially since my Hubby wouldn't be here with me anyway and now I am going to go watch the last LOST with him while he is here.
When Swans Attack
OK I know it is a sensationalist title...So, today we went to City Park to spend some time letting the Little Guy run around and generally have a good time. We stopped at an area with a lot of ducks and other water fowl. I had some crackers in the car so we walked over to the water and proceeded to feed the ducks. This was tons of fun for everyone, there were lots of ducks, some geese and seagull type birds. There were also two big black beautiful swans. They were eating our crackers and we were pleasantly enjoying the day when one of the swans wa
ddled out of the water and nipped LG. It happened really fast, I grabbed LG, Super Hubby kicked the swan to make him let go and away we went. LG cried for just a minute, I think he was more scared than hurt but he was ready to get in the car and go home. After we got home I was able to check LG out more thoroughly, he has a little mark that looks kind of like a hickey where the swan pinched him. Today we learned that swans have long necks and they can grab you even when you think you are far enough away, I just hope LG isn't afraid of the ducks next time we go to the park because he enjoyed feeding them so much before, I will have to keep you all posted on that.
P.S. the swan was fine too for those of you who are interested. He walked away fine after the kick.
Things they don't tell you pt.1
There are tons of things that "they" don't tell you about having kids. Some of them are those instinct things that I couldn't explain to you even if I wanted to and if I did I would be wasting my time typing. Some of the things though can be explained as a matter of fact they are really easy to understand it is just no one ever says anything about them. And if they do it is in jest. Why this is I do not know because I know for a fact my kid is not the only one these things happen to so in the spirit of sharing the truth about parenting I am going to do a series of posts on the things they don't tell you.
They fall down all the time:
Before I had my son I read books and all the magazines and scoured the Internet for information. I wanted to be well prepared so I could be the best Mommy I could be. Everywhere I looked they were telling me to baby proof this and fence off this. It is so easy for accidents happen and so it is my responsibility to put plugs in the outlets and make sure he doesn't fall down the stairs. What they don't tell you is none of that matters your kid will run into walls, he will be walking on a perfectly flat sidewalk and fall flat on his face, he will roll off of chairs and out of the bed. From the time he starts to crawl he will virtually always have a bruise on his forehead and none of them will lead to a concussion. In the beginning every time he slips off the couch I ran to inspect him thinking about how he was hurt not whether he was hurt or not. Reading all the articles led me to think that if he fell down it would be the end of the world but the truth is he falls down all the time with nothing more to come from it but maybe a bruise or scrape.
Why don't they tell you that little kids fall down all the time? I know they want us to be on the lookout for serious injuries and they want people to baby proof their houses to help prevent those really serious injuries but why can't they be realistic? Because they only talk about the extremes they make us normal folks feel insecure when things just go normal. So, don't you worry it is normal for your little one to fall down and run into things, they are working on their coordination and falling is part of the process.
My first blog award thingy
Last night I took part in a ok I don't even know what it is called but it was on tweetchat. It reminded me a lot of chatting with my friends in Highschool way back on AOL. It was a lot of fun though and while I was relaying a story about my son coming into our room in the morning and jumping on my stomach so I was awarded the Best Mom in the World Award.
I won the Best Mom in the World Award at Cutest Kid Ever. Think you’ve earned one?>
Alaskans upset by Volcano
When I logged into my Earthlink account today I found this article. I can understand complaining about your situation and not being able to look beyond it to the big picture (Hell I do it all the time) but this one I find kind of funny. So, people in Alaska are upset because this volcano that they live next to has been spewing ash for a while now and it messes with their daily lives. This is unfortunate but all I can think is WHY AREN"T YOU HAPPY YOU AREN'T DEAD???
I mean they live close enough to this volcano that if it decided to really blow they could very well be dead. No, oh isn't is a pain in my ass that I have to wear a mask to keep from breathing ash but Covered In Molten Lava Dead. Shouldn't they be happy?
I'm a winner
A few weeks ago I entered a contest on Your Mama Reviews blog. I got word that I was a winner a few days ago and today I received my prize. It is a gift box full of LUSH products. Oh My God I love LUSH!!!!!!!!!!! just a couple more !! I was first introduced to LUSH about 5 years ago when my husband and I flew to New York City to visit a couple friends of mine who had recently moved up there. When we returned to Fort Myers where we lived then I was bummed that there wasn't a LUSH store within any kind of reasonable driving distance. Then we moved to New Orleans. And there was LUSH, withing walking distance. Right after the hurricane they were having crazy giveaways too, which was really good for me so I partook much and often. When the little one came I took him a few times to LUSH parties when he was still young enough to fit in a sling or backpack carrier but now they don't go over so well. Which is another reason I am so glad to have this LUSH just show up at my door.
My Kid's a Genius
Do you know what this is? That's right it's Doree. Doree's official name is regal blue tang fish and we saw one today at the aquarium. So there we are about ten of us. Me and my son as well as a coupld other people from our playgroup and some other kids on a field trip, all looking in this one tank. The tank had brightly colored coral with bright lighting and an array of brilliantly colored fish we were all mezzmerized. Then my son points at one of the fish and says "Doree." He is 2 years old probably the youngest one standing there but he is the one who noticed. Maybe that doesn't make him a genius technically but it does make the rest of us look a little slow.
My List
in an effort to get a hold on my life and not become overwhelmed taking on more than I can actually accomplish I have made this list.
- TV in Bedroom (it isn't even plugged in)
- Cabinet in Kitchen (It got cut out when we put in the dishwasher and just sits in the corner)
- Elmo Dolls (my little one never plays with them, he never did) Anybody want a tickle me Elmo and an Up,Up Elmo?
- All the empty boxes around the house (I keep thinking I will need to move or ship something)
- Filing Cabinet (I never use it)
- Recycling Service (they charge for it here)
- Carseat base (we still have the base to the carseat we haven't used in over a year)
- Decorative pillows (they currently decorate the space between the chair and the wall)
- Backpack Carrier (my big little guy doesn't fit in it anymore)
- Mardi Gras beads (we still have tons around the house)
- Move folding table to closet (it's just in the way)
- Clean off top of cabinet in Kitchen (so we can get rid of it)
- Move fan to attic (it works but no where to hang it)
- Put P.A. system on craigslist (to be tackled when hubby gets home)
- Put desk on craigslist (also when hubby gets home)
- Take recycling to The Green Project (since it is free there)
- Buy a filter and use regular coffee (I use K-cups for my Keurig right now)
- Put brain in a frame (this one is a long story, maybe it's own post?)
- grow sprouts (I used to do this is was easy and tasty)
- Chacha enough money to pay credit cards
- Rumba
- Scumba (these two would help my quality of life)
- Recycling bin.can in the Kitchen (instead of outside)
- New closet doors (ours are falling down
- Yard finished (it is a weedy mess, you can't play in that)
- Slip cover or patch for couch (it has a hole)
- To get info off harddrive (my old PC crashed)
- A couple short sleeved shirts (out with the winter)
- My hair cut (it has been so long)
- New refridgerator
- Stackable washer and drier
- Magnolia tree for the yard
- To redo the Kitchen
- Insulate under the house
- A cat
I bet she needs some affection.
So Michelle Obama hugged the Queen of England, some people are tying to make it into a big controversy but as far as I can tell from the video the Queen didn't mind and they did not break protocol because the Queen reached out and touched Michelle first so what's the big deal? Besides I bet the Queen would like a little extra affection every once in a while Hell if no one is allowed to touch her it must be horribly lonelly. OK she has the Prince (and I don't mean her son or grandsons) but still.
Let's try this again
Ok, I am going to try this again. Last month I did really good posting but just could not make the one post every single day cut. This month the theme is Growing (Up). I started a change just today that I think would fall into this category. I have fallen into a slump over the last year or so. I think that staying home with my son is the best thing for him and in a lot of ways the best thing for our whole family since I do not have a lot of skills that could bring in a lot of money so we would not be bringing in enough to make it "worth it" to put LG in preschool or daycare so why stretch our family life when it does not really make sense to do so? Even though I know all of this I have been having trouble being happy with myself just staying home taking care of a toddler. I am also having trouble living away from my Mom and Sister and with my Husband on the road for work so much of the time that leaves me alone with the LG a lot. I have been letting the loneliness take over my life so I have just made the decision to take my life back and be happy. I am listening to The Art of Happiness by the Dalai Lama, which is helping me a lot and I haven't even finished the book yet. I have all of these ideas that I used to believe in but somehow have become all cluttered with life since I had my son. I can tell that because I have moved away from these ideals my whole life is suffering so I have decided to move back to it, to clean out my mind and my life, to stop and smell the roses not just because I want to teach my son that the roses smell good but because I want to slow down and smell them myself.
So hopefully I will have plenty to blog about in April since I will be regrowing bits of myself this month.
