A change

Sunday, May 10, 2009

I've been Thinking of a change. I have been searching for direction in my life. It seems like ever since I gave been a stay at home Mom the main thing that I have lost is a sense of self and the direction to life that comes with it.

It seems unlikely I will find that direction by going back to work anytime soon and so it is clear that I need to find purpose on my own. Something unreliant on everyone else that motivates me to continue on and better myself. I do not want to become dull I want to be sharp and useful to the world.

Some people would say I should feel useful by Mothering my son. After all if I raise him "right" could I not produce a sharp man? Yes, but a persons self worth should not be linked to any other persons actions including their children.

My goal right now is to reclaim that direction for myself.

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